While we are on the topic of bunnies, I should mention my Boyfriend

I was looking over Stephanie’s blog and stalking her adorable knitting via etsy and I couldn’t help but notice how cute her bunny Roland was. It got me thinking back to my former pets. My parents weren’t really dog people. If we wanted to pet a puppy dog, our parents let us go over to our neighbors home and play with their weiner dog, Stretch. Thinking back on it, I wonder if they named the dog that as a sexual innuendo. Gross. We were goldfish people. That was it. I don’t consider it much of a pet though considering you can’t take it out and pet it or play with it. Yea, I learned that the hard way when I was younger. Rest in peace, Goldie. Yep, Goldie the goldfish. Not so creative, but hey, I was five so lay off. When I was in fourth grade I got the genius idea that if my parents wouldn’t buy me a pet, I would simply sneak one into the house. I gave my friend Gabriella a dollar bill in exchange for one of her pet salamanders as my own. I hid Sally the salamander (again, a name with loads of creativity) in a butter dish on top of the laundry room cabinet. I suppose I thought my mom wouldn’t find it, but as luck would have it, Sally was a little bitch who decided to break free from the makeshift cage and piss all over the living room carpet. My mom found her. Her stay in our house was short lived and my dad took her down to the country club three days after she moved in with me and threw her in the lake. It was really for the best though. I found out you had to feed them crickets and I was not about to take part in that gross ritual. Eventually, my parents gave into this whole pet idea and bought me two bunnies for my birthday. There names were Peony and Columbine. They were both girls…or so we thought. After the herd of rabbits grew, we had to get rid of the bunnies. We got a new one later on and then ended up getting rid of him as well. Pets are just not a part of my family. They did however become a part of our little family during my sophomore year of college. My roommate “La” had the brilliant idea to buy a bunny for the four of us girls in the apartment. Unbeknownst to us, we had a new part of our tiny apartment family. Fish? I’m fine with. Gerbils? Why you would want a vermin as a pet is beyond me, but be my guest. Rabbits however did not belong in our apartment. At all. It was so small already, we just didn’t have room. We had a small love-seat and chair and coffee table that just barely fit into our living room. We had no closets and no room for more than two people to sit at the kitchen island. Our apartment was a veritable shoebox. Also, we had one bathroom and one shower…between the FOUR of us girls. Might I add that this never works out very well. Ever. Naturally, the bunny eventually had to be sold back to the pet store. We had commitment issues….did I mention that the bunnies name was Boyfriend? Some things never change.

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