Has anyone seen the show “Little Miss Perfect” on WE? I was flipping channels one day and found myself intrigued for some reason. It’s like a trainwreck…or breastfeeding…you want to look away, but you are strangely sucked into how it works and what the hell is going on. My mom could not be more anti pageant if she tried. After the whole Jon Benet thing, she had a conniption fit every time she saw a little girl in makeup or flashy clothing. My mom is uber conservative, but not much of that rubbed off on me (as you may have figured by now). Not that I think pageants are great, but I’m just not as strongly opposed to them as she is. I am however slightly opposed to putting younger girls in pageants. I get the whole Miss America Scholarship hooplah, but why the hell are there sixth month olds participating in pageants?! They are falling asleep on stage! The little girls are crying as their mom rips through their over processed bleach blonde hair. I feel bad for these little girls because while they have fun if they win, the whole process for them is really miserable.
The only thing to do at this show then is to laugh. You can’t possibly take these people seriously. The pageant mom is always a good seventy-two pounds over weight and while she chain smokes outside she talks about how she never got to do this as a kid, but totally doesn’t think she is vicariously living through her daughter. Her seven year old WANTS to be doing these competitions. Yeah, right. The host is always gayer than the day is long and proclaims himself the queen of fabulosity. Ok now, I love my gay friends, but I’m sure that if they were asked what there dream job was, it would not include dancing around on stage and crowning little miss kentucky fried shit show. As he sings about citrus colored rainbows, the girls have glazed over eyes and a semi serial killer look on their face. I don’t think that is anyones dream.
One of the mothers said that putting makeup on your child is really no different that strapping shin guards on your child. Really? Because I kind of thought that shin guards were for protection from balls flying at you and lipstick from Revlon’s dirty little harlot collection was used to solicit your child sexually, not protect them. Maybe I am wrong though.
My favorite quote from the show though came from the mother of Molly. She said “Molly will compete in pageants until the day she says “Mommy, no more.” Now, I’m no child specialist, but when Molly can’t actually talk (because she hasn’t learned how yet) and she screams and kicks and cries every time she goes on stage, I’m fairly certain that is actually Molly’s own little way of saying “Mommy, no more.” Again though, I could be wrong.
I feel like there should be an age limit on these things. I don’t mind the “pageants” that are thinly veiled fundraisers (like baby contests and such at church) but the ones the judge only on beauty need to go. I’m no psychologist, but I’m sure that it can’t be good to tell a 3 year old that they’re not as pretty as the rest of the 3 year olds. Especially not a 3 year old girl. The issues she’s going to have when they’re older…
Now if the little girls were like the main character in Little Miss Sunshine, then I’m all for it.
BT-Dub, I love the “sometimes you disappoint me” tag.
I saw one where the mom said something along the lines of “when my daughters says that she’s doesn’t want to do this anymore, we’re done” only to have the 5-year-old look her right in the eye and go “Mommy. I don’t want to do this anymore. SERIOUSLY” and I’m pretty sure that the mom shoved her off of camara and mumbled some excuse about how the little girl was just “tired” or “being silly” and couldn’t have actually meant that. It’s terrifying (and just a little sad). Hurray for trashy television, though…it always makes me feel better about myself.
hahahaha! i wholeheartedly agree! those little pageants freak me out. i just don’t believe that little girls should be overly dolled up like that… the whole thing is a weird freak show!
It’s so sad to see those parents living vicariously through their kids.
I love this show, though I feel a tad guilty for indirectly supporting such a morally bankrupt industry. The mothers are so absurd, it’s hard to believe that this is seriously the height of their ambition.
As for WE TV, I highly recommend Bridezillas if you haven’t watched it. Trashy women’s reality TV at its finest.
Gonna comment on this later…you know I will but I just wanted to share your DM to me the other night via Twitter:
maddiemariedear wizzie, i’m wizasted. or wasted. who knoes. thought id sen dyou a Dm. ok. goodnighty night=)
about 13 hours ago
…Oh kitten….
I’ve not seen this one, but I have watched Toddlers & Tiaras on TLC. Pretty much the same concept. You described the pageant moms perfectly.
I can’t watch those shows! They just make me furious. But, if you’ve never seen the movie “Drop Dead Gorgeous”, then you should find yourself a copy posthaste. It might give you a taste of what those tots & their mamas will be like in a few years. ; D
Since that Jon Benet incident, I too get so disgusted with the whole pageant thing. From baby to adult. It is absurd especially the way these moms are so adamant about making their daughter’s childhood a living hell simply because their’s was. OMG! I could just go on & on about this…it’s child abuse!!!